Well, weekend is just a day away. But I'm not really looking forward to it. Maybe coz my body is still aching with my First Aid Course for the past 3 days. Yesterday, my aunt already warned me to fetch my sons early. It's not that I don't want to fetch them earlier but I was just thinking of taking a nap or rest before I fetch them. I don't like being accused of being lazy when sleepy at her place or she thought that I'm having fun outside. What fun? The fun I ever had recently was , when I'm at work or having course together with my best buddy at work, Azna. I don't even get a chance to watch movies unless I count the time I took my son to watch 'Over The Hedge' recently. Shopping.. well I think the last time I really do window shopping was with family (cousins, aunt, in-laws, hubby, kids). I don't have the time to do that with friends coz I'm bz or they are. Well.. we are adults with responsiblities & commitments.

I love my sons to death. Both are soooo cute and adorable. Of course I would want to have them with me all the time but usually I'll be taking care of them myself. Hubby would be too tired or grumpy at times. Sometimes it can be quite stressful for me. I don't really know who to talk to. I'm the sort of person who would prefer letting it out. But I need to talk the correct person. I have a few close friends whom I would talk to regarding work, spouse, kids etc. But sometimes they too have problems of their own. I don't want to take advantage of our friendship and be selfish. So in the end I just bottled it all up. Who knows maybe one day I just crack up. I could just end up in the hospital (I know I shouldn't even think of suicide but sometimes I just can't help it) or IMH.

With another one on the way, I really don't know how I would be able to handle all 3 of them in future. Maybe I should just stop working and be a housewife and full time mum. But I don't think that would be a good idea. I can't cook for nuts or do proper housework. I hate stressing myself more. Argghhh... damn it.

Oklah, hubby home. He's eating dinner next to me. He even feed me some briyani. He can be sooo sweet at times. I love him to pieces. But I won't want to cross him when he's angry. It's too scary. I think I just stop now and eat dinner with hubby and watch my favourite show, Supernatural on AXN.